ANXIETY AND TENSION

Anxiety in any form, tension in any form - both leads to the stress - which is mostly not physical but mental stress. If somebody says that he has not experienced any anxiety that means either he is mentally imbalanced or totally dependent on others like a parasite.

Naming the anxiety and tension as another kind of "xyz phobia" is doing injustice to the person who came to you for a solace. Treating it as another mild physiological disorder or temporary adjustment of thinking process is also wrong. But that doesn't mean every anxiety is life threatening symptom. 

We need to exercise a caution when we are faced with anxiety, particularly the people who are above 50 years. How actually this tension generates and where from the anxiety comes up is to be verified and better if we start meeting this anxiety when it was still in the infant stage - that is when it started its initial signals.

Let's discuss the bare facts before we go into the details.

Anxiety is such for which the root cause is anticipation. Anticipation comes from our earlier plan of action. We plan something, and also we don't plan any thing and then anticipate some results - if you plan, you expect positive results and if you don't plan you expect negative results with a feeling that your lack of planning was the root cause for the probable negative results.

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Is every plan is going to be successful? Is every objective is reachable? and is every development is sustainable? The Plan itself indicates that it was an idea of sorts to meet an objective. We do consider many contingencies and make necessary allowances still, the contingencies are contingencies! They do appear and pose like a hurdle and take the plan to a diversion route.

If you have not planned!  Let the things go as they are destined. May be you may have to meet more contingencies.  There is a natural phenomenon here that - for a planned course of action contingencies are more, and for unplanned course of action, contingencies are less! Did you ever experience it?

The reason being the difference between the optimist and pessimist!  Don't get hurried to call me as another pessimist. There are advantages of being a pessimist.  He is prepared; he is not concentrating on his planned and anticipated results; he is making alternative arrangements; he will take it lightly as he was not expecting some thing; that brings us less contingencies and - even if they are there, he is prepared for that!

Looking at the other side, as he has planned the course, with anticipated and expected hurdles, he will get shocked if some thing other than anticipated is standing before him - as he was not expecting it and he was not prepared for that.

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I suggest that you use your brain - but don't over use it - on things which takes it own sweet time to come around, on things you have not control, on things which you can not use direct force and on things - particularly the living horrible things - on which you have love, for example the Kids!
There are many people who are exerting too much of their brain power on their children and loved ones usually exhaust not only their physical strength but also over extend their brains up to the point when it needs a considerable time for getting recharged and relaxed. If you still try and over burden the brain, then they you having nervous breakdowns, depression and other mental problems.
The medicine these type of people requires is not available in any medical stores or super markets but it is with you called - strong-will. May be it is a bit hard to exercise the strong-will against easiest way getting anxiety, but trying to be calm and cool when there are little upsets and common pressures leads to position where you can use that will to control yourself in times of extreme pressure.

Instead of running for the psychiatrist, better make an analysis of yourself honestly and look towards you and your situation and ask yourself whether the quantum anxiety which you are experiencing is necessary or required. 

A study was made recently by a news paper and it was found that anxious people read others' facial expressions faster than less anxious people. And it was that they are also more likely to misread them.

Coming back to the initial part of the article, we are talking about the anticipating the things which is causing the anxiety.  You expect that you will get promotion - and when the time is approaching you will be depressed thinking that you may not get the promotion.

You anticipate that your daughter will come back home from party by eight in the night and when the time is approaching seven, you will start thinking about what to do if she has not come by eight.

You expect that your son will send you the money and when the due date is approaching you will get anxiety. 

You want things in a way YOU want it, irrespective of what other people are working, making, meeting their dead lines, following the time table etc.,
You want the flight no DC 450 to land at half past seven and you get anxiety when it was delayed and even after it was announced at the Air Port!

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If you are not taking it as another spiritual discourse, I would like to narrate an ancient Sanskrit story:

At times you feel dejected and derailed at the way things are going against you. There will be some instances in our life - in which we will be forced to do such things which we usually would have refused to do - come what may! The following story is to narrate how you may have to do or experience or get into the acts which are totally against your conscience and ethics.  And also the beauty of the curiosity is explained so vividly. If you have purchased a vehicle - and got a number plate - then invariably you read the number plate of each and every vehicle which passes before you and compare that number with yours! Let's come to the story:

Somayajulu is a learned man is walking on the seashore on his way back to his home. Fortunately or unfortunately he is endowed with the powers of reading the future of a person by looking at his forehead, with an interlock that revealing his knowledge to anybody will bring him the instant death! 

While he was walking, suddenly he was looking at a round shape and when he tried to look at it, he saw a human skull. It was lying in the midst of the sand. He thought for a moment and took it and washed in the sea waters and - like number plate - he started reading the lines on its forehead.

Janma Prabhruti Daaridryam
Dasa Varsha Nibadhdhanam
Samudra Teere Maranam
Kinchit Sesham Bhavishyati

Literally - the meaning for each line was:
Poverty from the childhood,
Ten years of imprisonment,
Death on seashore, and
Yet some balance is left.

He thought over this for a moment to analyze the correctness of the writings. He thought that the first two predictions can not be checked and might be true. But the third one, "death on seashore", appears to be correct, since the skull is found on seashore.

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Somayajulu was in a fix about the fourth one - when the death has taken place- how come another line appears? And what was there to be a balance which is left for whom?   He spent a considerable time in.  His curiosity is increasing and he was totally under the spell of that last line. Unconsciously he started walking again and entered his village and suddenly he realized so he covered the skull in a small piece of cloth and hide it in the carry bag and entered the house and went straight to his room and then kept the skull in a shelf and then went to the back yard to wash his hands and feet. He was upset and anxious about knowing the fate's writings and also worried about how to do the research without making his wife suspicious.  At last he took his dinner and went to his room and was muttering the last line repeatedly and was observing the skull time and again and was awake for full night thinking the probabilities.

There was no result in his research even after checking few ancient books he has acquired. This was going on for two days two night and the extreme change in the pattern of day and night's life of Somayajulu  - naturally created a string of suspicion in the eyes of his wife.

The following night she was in more tension to know the reason behind the anxiety of her husband. So she was hiding in a place and was observing him without his knowledge. Somayajulu - as usual after verifying that she was fast asleep, got up and took the skull and looking at it very constantly and steadily. He was analyzing the reasons and the meaning behind the last line which says that "there is still some thing balance to be experienced by that owner of the skull! - Even after his death!

She was shocked and crestfallen on seeing his antics! She tried to control herself but in vain. She suddenly burst open the door and entered the room and furiously demanded about the skull and the way he was treating it.

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Poor Somayajulu was aghast and stunned and still was unable to speak about it as it will bring the instant death to him - but tried to pacify her with other talking.  And being an adamant, she refused to listen any thing from him.

She started shouting  and abusing him and declared
" You thought that you can cheat me! Yeah?"
" You are a rascal of sorts and you kept the secret of having a girl friend even before my marriage and you were going under the pretext of going to another village, and enjoying her for all these years!
Now that she died!  And YOU, You miserable, you won't leave her even today and you start beginning to worship the skull - alone!"

Shouting and weeping in between she went inside and brought a grinding stone and pulled out the skull from him and crushed it with stone into pieces!

Then Somayajulu thought and realized about what it was meant by " there is some balance of experience is left for the skull"

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In order to get married, one has to attain an age; in order to have children you need a wife; in order to get a job, you require having a qualification - Then all people are not doing same professional course and all people are not getting married at once. If you expect and anticipate and reject many girls thinking that you will only marry a fair and beautiful girl - beware, the girl which is fated to you - looks like most beautiful girl in the world - at the time of wedding. And by the time you realize, your first night is over!

When you can not change your wife's antics, when you can not anticipate at what time milkman will arrive exactly when you don't know the main heading of the morning news paper - what is in our hands! But that will not allow you to become a saint or seer or sage - You will have to practice the family traditions and undergo the cycle of life, taste the bitter an sweet and enjoy or experience the pain - earn money strive to earn more, struggle to save it, create trouble and have trouble to maintain it - leave everything including the cloths and go towards the SRI HARI.  You have neither accountability nor you have responsibility. You are alone, alone in an unknown world, alone without any knowledge and without any anxiety and tension and what ever you did for all these years - is just nothing.

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